Beat Yourself Up With A Feather, Not A Bat

Unsplash | @elgassier_photography

‘Beat yourself up with a feather, not a bat,’ my husband told me after hearing me spin the proverbial wheel of all the ways I feel ‘not good enough.’

I was surprised when listening to myself at how easily I tore myself down. Do you ever really listen to yourself? The spiral or tail-spin of self-deprecating dialogue between you and yourself. It’s debilitating.

Perhaps that’s the point. There’s a spiritual philosophy that human beings enjoy suffering - that we crave it and the lack of suffering inspires us to create more suffering. But, I have another philosophy. That every and any bit of suffering - every experience or opportunity - is a lesson in expanding our love.

When you practice meeting yourself with love, you discover your worth. When you know your worth, you harness your power. When you stand in your power, your threshold for suffering will dissipate and the love you attract will multiply.

Here are my steps on how to flip the negative script and expand the love that you so deserve:

Know your triggers. Get curious about what triggers your mental beat-down. What are the circumstances or happenstances that illicit your automatic negative response? Who and what and where opens the window and lets the suffering in?

Love your wounds. Every trigger has an original wound that needs your love. Meet your wound with less anger, frustration, and negative self-talk and more compassion for your experience. Give yourself the love you didn’t receive then and watch how it heals what hurts now.

Affirm your worth. My Guides finally had enough of my self-deprecating shit so they woke me up one morning and downloaded a slew of affirmations in my head that I involuntarily began repeating. My favorite? I deserve great things. I deserve love. I deserve happiness. I deserve peace. I deserve great things.

So, put down the bat, pick up the feather, and treat and speak and love yourself in the way you deserve, because you deserve it.